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Cooper has a dream of a 'Nightmare'

Vincent Price, TV's horror scorer, does the narra­tion in "The Black Widow" song on Alice Cooper's latest Atlantic LP.

That should give you some idea.

"This is my prize," exults Price, the museum curator, warning the little nippers to keep their hands off the exhibits.

"What I love most about the Black Widow is her innate desire to conquer and possess," he adds.

In fact, the time is com­ing when we humans (the stumbling, demented man-child) stumble for the final time and the Widow rises.

"We're all humanary stew,

If we don't pledge allegiance to,

The Black Widow," the group sings.

Incidentally, the Black Widow will get Cooper at his April 4 show at the Coliseum, assuming, of course, that the Richfield Township Trustees don't get him first.

The title of the album is "Welcome to My Night­mare." By a strange coincidence, that is also the name of Cooper's Coliseum show.

"Nightmare" (no relation to Artie Shaw's 1937 theme song) is a stew of some rather weird ingredients. How about a little insanity, cannibalism, masochism, necrophilia and transvestism?

But as always Cooper's albums have an undercurrent of spoof that takes the edge off the craziness. There is also a good mix of melody and instrumen­tal power.

The title song is strong, more of an instrumental song. Cooper comes on quietly like a wounded mouse, then gets stronger as he welcomes you to a "nocturnal vacation, unnecessary sedation."

Perhaps the hardest-hitting is "only Women Bleed," co-written by Cooper and guitarist- vocalist Dick Wagner. There is just a little too much truth in here to be weirdo or even light.

Another song, "Depart­ment of Youth," has a rollicking beat, although it seems a little dated. It's the least offbeat, however.

One of the radio-recom­mended cuts is "Cold Ethyl." Ethyl seems to be as frigid as an Eskimo Pie and makes love by the refrigerator light because she lives in the refrigerator. She's dead. This song might make it as a novelty.

They say that there is a little boy in every man that never dies.

Cooper has a revealing portrait of a little boy who hates to leave the carnival, even though "all my friends went home years ago" (grew up.)

Alice Cooper is living proof that not growing up pays.

Alice Cooper plays the Coliseum on Friday, April 4. His album is "Welcome to My Nightmare."